Taking leave...

As children, we loved holidays. School's out, and it's time free to own... ok, except for the holiday assignments. The best times were those breaks in kindy and uni. No homework, no holiday assignments... basically, just time on our own - simply to relax and recharge - then start everything afresh.

Growing up, taking leave from routines are no longer as carefree. The people in the adult world take leave from routines, only to satisfy other's expectations. They flock away from home, rush through places, taking pictures. Don't be mistaken. I have nothing against picture taking. In fact, I like taking pictures. They are memories to which are extremely valuable especially for people like me who's showing early signs of alzheimer... Neither am I against going on overseas trip, taking time to explore the world, away from the familiarities and being intoxicated in THE mood.... ah.....

But some people do not share the same reason. The pictures, are to them, evidence of having spent the bucks. All so that the "so, where have you been?" question asked at the pantry may be answered with pride. They shoot quizzical looks when I say I am staying home on my leave days.... Adults are weird creatures...

Nontheless, I took leave from work today as I did not think it a good idea to start the 27th year of life half-panting in the rat-race. It was nice to be able to wake up without the alarm clocking crying above the head, laze about, select and read the papers, have lunch at time past noon, take a cuppa, fiddle the piano, gamed a little, nap a little, and basically just let the day pass in leisure. No fuss, no faze. Simply nuah....

It might have been just a little more perfect if there were no emails, and reports to send.... and I can start everything afresh when I return from the break.... Taking leave from routines sure ain't the same anymore.... there can be no fresh new starts after the break. (Hopefully) Just a refreshed spirit. And now, back to the same work again.....
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Is there a "Right-ER" one? Roll the dice now..... and hope to win a Newfoundland....

Hong surfed into Yin's blog the other day, came upon the post titled "Meeting the Right person, but too late", and msn-ed me a question: is there a right-er person?

As we exchanged views on the multiple new paths that she is preparing to tread, we concluded with lamentations that everything are unknowns.

All's but uncertainties ahead - and we ain't just talking about relationships.

Is it stay or go?
Is it now or when?

How to know that the future is going to be better than the present?
How to know that a choice made is right?
How to tell if the faith placed is true?

Whatever the case, choices prevails in everyday living. The gamble has to be taken, and the dice has still gotta be rolled. Let's just hope that regardless, it will be our win day at the end of the story.

Hong's closest advisory told her that education has made us go on needless digs and analyses. Ah well, do hope that she's right. Everything will definitely be easier if we can go about making gutsy choices without fears and interpretations, and yet get all the enviable wins.

I'd sure like to not think anything, and be able to still win bon vivant sustenance, and a good newfoundland whatever the path ahead...... if only i have faith, the size of a mustard seed....

"...do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own..." ~ Matthew 6:34~

* Coincidentally, the dog named the newfoundland is one who has outstandingly sweet temperament, is genteel, generous, intelligent, patient & loyal.

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An update on school...

Time flies. It has been a quarter of a year since class turned on, starting with a lecture a week, to three..

Going back to school is a break-away from the routine and the "everyday people" (people you meet everyday) grown too accustomed over the last 3 years.

Initial Accounting and Banking lectures were led by a Harry guy who proclaims everything "kancang". Through two sessions of 1.5 hours lectures, he will "kacang" his way through, with the quizzical students dragged along, driven nuts picking up the litters of information. Have problem balancing the sheets? "No problem", he would say, "Continue playing with the numbers, and you will get it." And on, he will walk, invigilating and avoiding the lane in your aisle the next time he has the students fumbling over questions flashed in small fonts on the overhead projector. A young boy in the class said he is not a teacher, but an aspiring magician... well, either that, or he had simply over-rated us! =D

The best thing about him is that class will definitely end on time as he kept watch on the wall clock like a hawk, harping on how detrimental it is to be having classes at evenings late.

You guessed it, he was ousted out after a review. Nonetheless, there wasn't a feeling of the least of any remorse. In fact, he was glad to be off the hook to hold classes in the evenings. To start with, he aint' really that interested to teach the late classes, if not (in his own words) "for the money".

That made the next Accounting lecturer shine against his bad record. She went through every tiny details, punctuating her lines with "Are you clear?", while everyone responded back in a typical Singaporean behaviour (that is, stare back at her). I guess most are really appreciative at least for her earnestness though. Ok, except for a big nosed guy who went up to her to tell her not go to those details, cos' he has done accounting in his secondary school years before and it's a repeat of what he had learnt.... totally without empathy for pathetic science students like me who'd struggling to make out heads and tails... Anyway, that's probably just an example of typical i-me-myself person lar, i guess...

ah well, irritating, yes, but i'm still pretty cool with it.... anyway, what makes him think that he can still remember what he learnt in seconday school... I think i even have problem remember V=IR or was it V= I/R? okie... maybe i'm just lousy.... whatever...

It is also interesting to see how people learn nowadays. While I employ the ol'fashioned way of scribbling illegibly through lectures, I actually spot some guys holding up their phones and taking time to perform photography on the screen notes. Well, that probably means that these people can read their "notes" on the go. Whip out your phone, and there are the powerpoint slides.... cool! but then again, they must have really good camera phones...... hahah...

The new banking lecturer is also a pretty jolly guy who consistently calls himself Uncle Ngoh. But hey, Uncle Ngoh is definitely not your typical Uncle. He holds impressive portfolios, but remained pretty humble in his dealing with people. The best, best thing about him is his willingness to share his notes. This is something Harry won't do, harping on the fact that they are notes that he wrote on his own.... and mind you, Harry's notes are full of typographical errors that he conveniently dismiss as the result of his poor typing skills.... makes me wonder what program he used to type his notes.....

Law classes are a tad different.

We have a lecturer who's simply gregarious and engrossed in teaching. When the time came when the school decided to move him out to teach other classes, the law students stood together and petitioned against it.

Aside from keeping the students awake with his animations, there were countless dictations to keep awake through the hour. I have used up two Stabilo pens in a short time frame of a month. Fidgeting students who have classes next often are caught in the dilemma of choosing to sit or to move. Poor things....

The law class is another scene altogether - kinda different from the i-me-myself centered group of people in the accounting class. The law species enjoyed group discussions and ideas sharing much more - even stopping for the ones who are having problem catching up - without thinking it is a waste of time... Too bad, i do not have the luxury to engage in those group things they've regularly got. I'd think they must be pretty enriching...



Anyway, that's all to update on school for now.... to justify the reason behind the lag in updates for a period too long...... realised that working and studying is too much of a stunt for me to play. bushed lar....

Not a blog

When Darkness of Night obsures all the Light,

I feel all alone.

When Heavens are brass, and though I may ask,

No Answer would come.

When my Faith is weak, the future looks bleak,

And life seems so wrong,

I've learnt to say, "Jesus, Jesus, please make me strong!"

When life's fondest dreams, my plans and my schemes

Refused to come true.

When that which I prize, for which my heart cries,

I cannot pursue.

When God's ways seem strange,

I'm prone to complain, "My Blessings are few!"

I've learnt to say, "Jesus, Jesus, please see me through!"

I've learnt that He cares and He shares in my hour

Of sorrow and grief.

I've learnt that He chastens,

But hastens to bring me welcome relief.

I've learnt that my Saviour is waiting and willing to dry all my tears.

I've learnt to say,"Jesus, Jesus, thank you for calming my fears."

When my work is done,

And life's setting sun begins to sink fast.

When temptation sores afflict me no more,

They're part of the past.

When Eternity is Reality, and done are my tasks.

Then I will say, " Jesus, Jesus, thank you, I'm home at last!"

Don't know why, but the tune of the old chorus has been ringing in my head the last few days. Haven't been able to remember all the words, and thus resolved to dig it out. I suppose this is a really old chorus that no churches sing anymore. You won't even find it in the net. I probably won't know it too, if not that for the fact that I "originated" from a real historic church whose choir would appreciate and sing the yellow pages left from the youth of the grey-haired (at least during my time)... Nontheless, the words are no less meaningful.

So many times, questions asked yield no answers. In fact, there are many more times where God seems too far even for questions. Other times, I even feel that I don't know how to take the next step - or leap.

Is life to be one that follow the "normal cycle" that everyone else is leading?

It's so odd. Recently, I have been feeling that I need to stand for dreams to which I can prize. Dreams..... that I am also unsure of. Other times, the lazy side of me just settle for being dragged along what presents behind the veils with time... anyway.... I guess I am going out of point.....

In fact, I logged in not exactly to blog, but because I'd want to log the old chorus that speaks of something to me somewhere I won't forget.... I love reading words... I cannot imagine how the history of music can predate the written word.... I mean... I can't deny that music can swell emotions, but somehow, I think they are ornaments to stories conveyed in words. But music emptied with words are.... ermmm..... harder to appreciate.... ah well, at least for me.... I cannot really fully appreciate pure instrumental symphonies. But I love musicals though....

Anyway....guess that just prove even more that I am not musically inclined !

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A time for Girlie things...

Have a meet-up, book a pedicure - enjoy a soak, a scrub, some TCL and have the toes painted pink. Texted each other on dinner plans even though barely ten footsteps apart. Get nourishment from soup restaurant, then to Mac-Café for kopi and talk about everything that's happening without reserves.

Girlfriends are wonderful to be around.
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Back to school again

After 4 long years of being able not to worry about missing out on lecture notes, or not making sense of anybody's speech, it's with much anxiety that I approached the classroom again.

Through these past years, I have been attuned to instinctively neglecting speeches that don't make sense without having second thoughts about them, and switching off on boring speakers while appearing attentive. There was a time when I actually fell asleep during a meeting while scribbling, what I later found were doodles that I cannot make any sense of... Still, it was no big deal. For, having jetted back across the globe, and 6 months later, I am still surviving fine with what I may have missed then.

Guess it's different with studying. Miss the point, and it's probably a gone-case. Also, starting to make small talks and establishing rapport with new people again is no mean feat. Haven't been that great at that to start with... *shrug*

Anyway....

Well, let's just say it is giving my stale brain a second chance to turn the fungii into better tasting mushrooms...

Soon

Just read Hong's blog. In it, she's musing her being deliriously happy with her (quote-unquote) "hokkien spouting, short short ah beng", minus the hun-ki. Today, she also got to choose the flat of her heart's desire. Reading her life the past months, it was a picture of bliss that makes one go "aww-so-sweet...". Pretty much different from the dissatisfactions from years not too long ago. Guess she'd proven her choice right amidst the distracting buffet of tall, macho, nerd, and beng. Cool!

On the contrary, the last months of my life seemed to be a stark contrast. I seem to have been plagued with horrid, and I am still wondering what had gone wrong. Do hope I'll be able to blog some fairytale soon too...
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Drool Blog #4: Pretty Food look-alike

Yes, I have skipped drool #3 for #4. No, it's not because I can't count. I guess I might enter a post-dated #3. Well, till then....

The eve of the GST hike seemed to be a season to be jolly.... ermm... I mean... jolly seasons where you hear more ka-chings, and see longer queues of happy shoppers in more and bigger shopping bag? Shoppers were more reluctant than ever to leave the mall even when the stores switches off the lights in the fitting room.

When we stepped into Vivocity, at close to half past 5, the LMMM quickly detected the huge crowd in the mall and suggested we either do a really early or really late dinner. It's really aint that early dinner as half past 5 is my dinner time on a normal workday. Sticking to it is almost a no-brainer.

We thus embarked to shop around for cafes without queues, and found this place called White Dog Cafe. As we browsed the menu at its entrance, the service guy stepped forward and said their "food is quite good" (quote & unquote) in all earnestness. Unwilling to be wet blanket to that earnestness, we decided to let the White Dog feed us...

Ambience suited for class gatherings, the place has a casual chic. It is also one of the place that serves water in bottles.

Fine, that's not something worth raving about.... but then again, if you'd compare to the snob restaurants who won't spare me a drip of the tap water when I am paying service charges... to see a bottle of water served without question was generous. And I liked that bottle feel. The now-defunct Dome at Wheelock was the first place I've had water served in those bottles. Guess it kinda brought back some memories.... and I have always thought it is the practice of casual italian to serve water in those bottles. ... not sure why, but it gave a comfy feeling.. whatever...

As usual, we decided not to overeat and ordered some appetizers, a main, and a dessert. We thus ordered a dish of Sauteed mushrooms, and Salmon & cheese bruschetta for appetizer. Duck Confit was the main dish (something different from the usual fish and chips, although it's suppose to be one of the chef's recommendations). And (regretfully) we chose Brownies Galore as desert over warm chocolate cake with vanilla ice-cream.

The food came pretty. Okay, not the four dollars mushrooms sauteed with garlic though. (No pictures for the mushrooms, cos they didn't come that pretty enough for us to take pretty pictures of it). Just use your imagination.

However, the taste of the food was a tad less promising than the look of it.

Salmon & Cheese Bruschetta ($7.90)

The salmon & cheese mushroom bruchetta had big slices of smoked salmon on bread, and olive oil dribbled on it. However, there was no traces of any cheese. The bruchetta also fail as bruchetta. It looked like.... ermmm.... confectionery bread that I take for breakfast.... (although they claimed it's whole-meal. I take cheap white bread.). The side salad would also do better without the lame thousand island dressing, but with (my fave) balsamic vinegratte.

Duck Confit ($19.90)

The Duck Confit was a tad hard at certain parts, and (not trying to mimick Zhang Ziyi) too salty. Wikipedia says that Confits are preserved meat in their own fats. That duck probably had high salt content in its fats. Overall, it was less palatable than it looks.

The Brownie Galore was the most disappointing. Personally, I feel that the food had been mis-named. It should be called Ice-cream Galore.

Brownie Galore ($10)

There were only litters of brownies below 4 scoopful of ice-creams. We felt that the name was a little unjustified and misleading. Nontheless, service-wise, the cafe do score some points. Dishes were promptly whisked off, and there was no need to remind to serve dessert even with the huge dinner crowd.

Food's not that fantastic for the palate, but I guess it's passable. Well, let's just say I might return again if we have a class outing or something, someday...

Address: No 1 HarbourFront Walk #02-131/132 Vivocity

The Nondescript Mind Dreamin' Distinct

We were shopping the busy Citilink on Saturday when Hong looked at the youngsters walking alongside and suddenly lamented that we are no longer in that stage of life where the future is ours. It's like.... you know, when we were still in school, green and sprouting, teachers would spell that the future is ours and painted promises of us being the up-and-coming generation that will have nothing stop our wonderful dreams from realising....

That's right. When we were...

Having barely passed the quarter century, it didn't seem that we fit the bill of being ancient. (shopping for anti-wrinkle creams not counting.) But even as we bat our eyelid on that same blink, it did not seem out to tell anyone of less years that the future is theirs. (I am sure that is what my peers who turned teachers are freely telling their little customers of terror now)

Regretedly though, I can't even say that I have been there or done there - wherever or whatever "there" is. Have I missed the dream? or have I not even even dreamt before time has passed me by?

Even as I considered having a go at another degree, I am caught dumb when my LMMM knocks on me the question on what I would want to do eventually. I'd wanted to give a smart answer, or say I'll do something some big somebody does. But ermmm.... I can only manage a shrug and a big dunno.

Well, perhaps my brains' probably too empty to dream any big dreams of any big somebody at the moment. But Malcom Forbes (yes, the Forbes Magazine guy) said that education is suppose to replace an empty mind with an open one. Going by that logic, I guess I now know the smart answer the next time I am asked that same question. That will be to ply my mind open bigger than any big somebody's, open to more options. If everyone is the same as the other someone else, won't that be too boring?

Ah well, let's just hope my old brain won't be too difficult to flex open, and time may wait for me to dream my unique dream of the future mine: that distinct someone who's nondescript... And of course, realise the unclassified distinction.

"Life would be infinitely happier if we could only be born at the age of eighty and gradually approach eighteen." ~ Mark Twain

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The people most difficult to work with...

While Yin thinks that the most difficult working environment is one where people are rude to one another, I think the worst environment to work with will be one infested with opportunists. As a matter of fact, I have been plagued by just one, and that was enough to drive me up the tallest wall imaginable. I am even willing to call myself ungracious in the face of dealing with The Opportunist. Really cannot imagine being in the company of more.

The Opportunist is lethal, and potently imbalanced. The Opportunist marvels at problems. No, they aren't perfect challenges for The Opportunist to drive solutions. Problems are best chances for The Opportunist to jump into bitchy email writing mode, copy everyone that can be thought of, and start the "it's your fault, her fault, his fault, and it's also ITS fault, (basically the whole wide world's fault). Please check all the problem, and revert to me (so that I can use them as blackmail chips). I am boss now (yeah... the self-deluded who still cannot find a footing in the next rung) because I am NOT (must highlight, bold & underline) the cause of the problem. And yes, I want to have what I want because my boss (whom I think is great cos she can let out loud shrills that resonates through rooms and is probably also capable of breaking windows) says that I am the control hub."

Bwahahaha...

Yea, right! Who can pay when the pocket's empty?

To think that any gains may be reaped from finger-pointing exercises, The Opportunist must be either down-right naive, or is a big-time laughable loser who had been highly repressed.

I'll opt for the latter. Who else would do sneaky things like block others in their messenger contact list, and in turn, run unidentified programs to check who blocked them? People who had some deviant virus, i guess...

Trust me, having one Opportunist is definitely enough to be more than a handful. It is almost asphyxiating. I can do without one. Really cannot imagine being in a company of more than that... drop dead.