Awkwardly Self-conscious

Shopped the stretch from Isetan Scotts down to PS earlier in the afternoon in less than 2 hours' time. Shopping alone spoils all mood. Little wonder why it was said that shopping alone would avoid over-spending. Even as the sales signs beckoned, and I pass by the yummi-licous looking gelare parlor, nothing looked the least enticing enough to have me stop to indulge in anything alone. Perhaps, indulgence has to come with good company.

While at Paragon, the house of the upmarket and sophisticated shopping podium, I saw a yuppie at Bakerzin sipping his coffee and munching his sandwich, absorbed in a magazine, appearing totally at ease alone and indifferent to the crowd. I wish i could be equally cool, though I can't help but wonder if the appearance was really so, or if the magazine onhand was any disguise...

Being alone in a crowd makes me awkwardly self-conscious. I feel no anchor and it makes me spiritless. There was this queer feeling, and I was spooked by a unspoken dread. Oh boy, this is never what I had imagined life to be at this age....
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