It is amazing how friendships are formed.
I mean we meet different people everyday. People walk in and out of our lives, but we cannot call everyone friends. To be frank, even having lived a quarter of the century, I have not really been able to fathom the mystery behind how people grew from mere strangers to calling each other friends.
C.S Lewis wrote that friendship is unnecessary. It has no survival value; rather is one of those things that give value to survival.
As a young kid, I have always had queer emotions. I am never sure if being an insecure kid caused that or was it the sensitivity that caused the insecurity. Whatever it is, that did not help. As a pinafore-donning schoolgirl, I found it very difficult to grasp the idea of friends. Then, everyone I thought were my good friends actually turned out to have even better – or some call, best – friends. Such revelations often do not come as blessings. Surely, I do not need more affirmations that my existence is secondary.
As I grew up, I continued to pick up people along the way whom I now (still) call friends. I have never given up on this incomprehensible intricate called “friends”. Blame it on my fantasies, the soap series and fairy tales, but I still believe in giving the best to those whom I would want to call friends. To me, they are not friends because I need companies. I can survive quite well in solitude, with absolutely no necessity for disturbance in my life. But my friends are companies because, well, they are friends. They aren't simply just names on the list whom I tick and decide who I want for company today. Just as I hope I will be of value to their lives, I have derived value from each of them.
How this comes to being still perplexes me. For not even science can explain the mystical spark and chemistry involved when people decide that they want to be friends, and not just colleagues, classmates, associates or any of the likes. In fact, we do not even sit and decide that we want to be friends! The magic potion making us friends can thus not be replicated.
Today, to all my chums, I think I ought to let you should know that you are treasured and respected as a pal. No superficiality should tarnish that relationship. If there is any trace of that, I think we are better off kept as strangers....
This time, I hope the feelings toward those I call friends are mutual too….
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3 comments:
Hmmm... I think you shouldn't think too much about your friends having "bester" friends than you. Cos' it will make you unhappy if you keep worrying about it. I guess I used to feel like that when I was younger as well but now I find it much healthier to treat everyone as a good friend and enjoy their company when you can. I believe if you treat somebody sincerely, they will reciprocate your friendship :).
Actually, the point that I was going to make was not on the best friends or not conditions. Anyway, it's probably inevitable that different people tug the heartstring differently at different points of our lives...
Okay. Back to my point. The point that I was going to make was this: It is through a certain unexplainable affinity that people become friends.
However, friendships, like any other relationships, are intricate. We are not mere companies or entertainment tools. We are companies because we are friends and not friends because we need to have companions.
We should be careful how we feel towards each other (for sometimes it gets translated to actions) - and of course, hong is right - that is with lots of sincerity...
Boy.... I really think I should dig my brain out some day and probably check on the brain juice (if there is any).
Seems like I never can articulate my points clearly....
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